Discovering Myself

I came across this pretty neat website today, and even though the 100 Days is up I think you should still check it out. Miss Elaini-ous. God bless the children in India.

Whilst browsing through the blog of above mentioned site, I discovered another website that instantly caught my fancy. Empowered Traditionalist. What really caught my eye was the description of an E.T. and this post, because it's so not me. I've been thinking about what God expects me to be (seeing that I'm a woman) a lot lately and coming to a lot of convicting conclusions. For instance; in 1 Timothy 2 Paul talks about how women should behave themselves, from how they dress to how they sit quietly in church. He says "... likewise also that the women adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness- with good works. Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness. I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet."

Titus 2 also talks about womanhood, "Older woman, likewise, are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands that the word of God may not be reviled."

This verse really caught my attention last week and has made femininity precious to me, "Let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious." That's 1 Peter 3:4. A gentle and quiet spirit is beautiful to Him... I've been granted another piece of the puzzle that is who I want to be.

So, as I write this post, I'm wearing a T-shirt and jeans, but my hair is brushed and my posture is (attempting) respectful, but most importantly, my heart is longing for the courage to tell myself that it's okay (in fact, it's good) to be a lady and that gentleness is not a sign of weakness, but of strength. My heart is longing for something deeper than my usual wild party and loud joking, something deeper than dressing to impress a certain gender and painting my face and turning myself into someone that is no where near beautiful in God's sight. Because God's sight is the only sight that I should be worried about.

*sigh*

I can do this...

Samia