Firecracker.

So much for 200 posts by Christmas... lol

It's been a CRAZY semester.

My brain is mush, my heart is sore, my knees are shot, and I'm not sure whether I'm looking forward to tomorrow or not. Merely because it's tomorrow, another day. Not for any reason in particular of Monday December 26th...

I'm house sitting. It's really quiet. Hm, and a little chilly... did I bring a sweatshirt?... bummer.

And once again, I am found having the time to write but nothing to say.

Well, that's a lie. I have a lot to say. But I'm trying to practice discretion and I'm not sure that this is the place to say all that I have bottled up inside.

I noticed that the family has a keyboard in the other room. Maybe I'll go do some writing and get it all out. I got to get it out some how and I'm not in the mood to be having any more regrets than I already do... I think I'm going to go tell the dog about it. He's about as knowledgable on the subject of men as I am anyway...

Sheesh.

Life...

*sigh*

Samia

Goodnight, my Armaplillow.

This is Post #155... you think I could hit 200 by Christmas? That sounds like a good idea to me. :-)
Hm, but I'd have to come up with something to write about...
I'm in class again. The teacher is talking about mold in houses. Apparently it's not as dangerous as people think it is. Mostly hysteria, he says. Hm... I wonder what my Mother would say to that...
Did I tell you that I went Trick-or-treating? I haven't been since I was eight. I know, I'm almost 21, I shouldn't be Trick-or-treating, I'm too old, but I went with my little brother's and their high school friends and nobody knew that I was the chaperone. In fact, I had several people ask me what grade I was in that week.
I'm getting pretty excited about Christmas. Right now I'm wearing red and white striped socks that go all the way up over my knees. :-) I'm going to make ornaments for my coworkers. I'm making them with felt and ribbon, they'll be little sachet's with cinnamon and spices in them. My Mom's going to make ornaments out of cinnamon scented pine cones. I wish it would snow.
I have a red apron that I made last year. I think I'm going to add some pockets and maybe a little lace to it. :-)
(I'm so excited)
:-)

"Hold on a minute, I have to take my eyes out."

Ever used contacts?
It's quite the experience. :-)
Let me give you a mental picture...
So, it's Halloween. I dressed as Rogue, from the X-men, it's a comic book, I know, I'm a nerd... I didn't realize that until yesterday. So I've got white spray paint in my hair, a leather jacket, and a pair of gloves. But my eyes are brown (Rogue's are intensely green). So, I decided it would be fun to have green eyes for the day and when I got to work (at the mall) I walked over to the shoe store to get myself some green contacts (I know, the shoe store??? some how that didn't dissuade me from trying it... oh well, I can still see just fine). I get back to my store and I think to myself, "Hm, I'm not being very smart here... I've never used contacts before and I've never been taught how to use contacts... the package says not to use them if you don't have experience...hm...". I decided to nonchalantly ask my coworkers if either of them use contacts, secretly hoping that one of them would give me some instruction... no such luck. I did get a warning that the colored ones take a bit to get used to.
So I take myself and my little package of green contacts into the dark and dingy bathroom. Hands washed and dried, contacts sanitized, deep breath, contact on the finger, open eye, insert contact, remove finger and contact--- wait, no, the contact is supposed to stick to my eye, not my finger!
Ok... so... I guess I'll just start over... nope... still not sticking...
Then Val Pal comes in. "Your finger has to be really dry and the contact has to be really wet" she says, "and use your other finger, it works better." She watched me struggle for a minute and then said, "Try tilting your head either back or forward, that may help, but if you can't get it, I'll come and do it for you, sometimes that's easier."
Oh, right, somewhere in between the dialogue I managed to drop it. On the floor. Of the dark, dingy bathroom.
That can't be good.
Val said it would be fine though, if I put it in the sanatizing solution and let it sit for a little while.
The audience may be shouting at me, "No! Stop! Bad idea! You need your eyes!" but remember, I was being awefully ignorant on this day.
So, she leaves, and I try it again... still no luck and Val comes back to do it for me.
"Sit on the toilet so I can get to your eyes." she instructs. I look down at the toilet and she chuckles.
There's not toilet seat cover.
So I perched myself at the edge of the cleanest looking part of the toilet seat and prepared myself to have someone stick their finger in my eye.
Even Val had trouble getting it in. By the time she was done with the one I had tears streaming down my face (my eye really didn't like having something in it). I wasn't in pain at all, my eye was just doing it's very level best to get that contact out! So Val told me to take it out and she'd wash it again, just to make sure that there wasn't dirt on it. Sure enough, there was a tiny speck of dirt on it and when it was reinserted into my eye I was fine, no tears, no uncontrollable blinking. "That was way easier!" she declared. (Isn't God creative! my eye is smarter than my brain!) The second one was just as easy and all of the sudden my shift was up and it was time to go home. I left with many thanks to Val Pal for her assistance and a feeling of greater kinship with my coworkers.
Oh, and green eyes.
:-)

My Life is a Soap Opera?

I shouldn't be blogging. I'm sitting in class... but he's just reading the chapter from the book that I could read any other time... in fact, I've read most of the book already. It's quite interesting. It's on architecture. So of course I've read most of it.

I like architecture. :-)

I've got the shakes. I should've eaten breakfast... oh well, I have a snack in the car for on the way home.

Who schedules classes at 8am??? Better question: Who takes classes at 8am? Me. That's who. I don't think I'll be doing that again... at least not while I'm working the closing shift the night before, that's for sure.

Random thought: impatient people bug me. They make me upset. Chill people. Really, please. We all see that you're upset that this is taking so long and you're just making yourself look like a jerk. Stop rolling your eyes and tapping your foot, it's obviously not making anything happen any faster.

Funny: I'm impatient with impatient people.

It really bugs me when people are impatient with children or elderly people. If your method of dealing with them isn't working then repeating yourself is not going to help. Besides, the more upset you get about it the more upset they get and that won't help either of you.

...

I never posted this... I'm just now rediscovering that... I left class in a hurry.

We had a mandatory "meeting" at work that really was just a required time of uninterrupted food, games, and laughing.

Have you ever seen a youth ministry paster jump up and down and shake from side to side in order to bounce the ping pong balls out of an empty tissue box tied to his rear end without using his hands?

It's quite the sight. No, really. It's hilarious.

It's even funnier when all three youth ministry pastors are doing it at the same time. Up on stage. In front of all of the church staff.

I was laughing so hard I wasn't able to count how many people left in a hurry because they'd wet their pants...

I hope we have another mandatory "meeting" again some time soon.

Ah, I love my job.

:-)

I'm off to class again!

Samia

Like a Witch by the Seat of Her Pants...

Halloween's coming up soon. I'll be working. That's my plans. Working. And possibly doing my nails up with black lace- something a bit bewitching I think. :-)

I love how this blog goes. I think of so many things to write about during the week and then when I do chance to have enough time to post... I haven't got anything worth anything to say! I mean, I suppose I do, but I can't think of it. I do have plenty to say, but I'm sure no one would go out of their way to read ramblings about what I put in my sandwich or how many footprints are quite visible on the kitchen floor (it's about to be mopped)... And then, when I do find something to say, whether it's worth reading or not, I lose the baby... I'll be right back...

It's a good thing that he's a smart kid, or else I'd constantly be getting in to trouble. He's banging on the piano now. This way I'll know if he moves from where I left him. :-)

Okay... I don't have anything to say... but the vanilla frosting in the back of the fridge does... it's calling my name...

Samia

The Tale of Two Boys

Today I was inspired to write a story, a children's story, about two boys and a chicken.

My youngest brother's best friend lives just around the corner and this morning he came over to play. To our surprise he brought a little friend with him- a baby chicken, probably less than a month old. We're not sure whether it's a girl or a boy, but the kids have taken to calling it "her" and named her "Chicky".

Chicky is becoming quite spoiled. :-)

She has quite the set of pipes and she uses them quite avidly when she wants to be picked up. The general consensus is that it's her first day with them and so they have to spoil her today. It's interesting how smart she is and how much she likes the boys. When she first came over to visit she was, as you would expect any lost chick to be, quite shy and timid. She has very much gotten comfortable with these rowdy and yet somehow gentle little boys.

"She loves being in my hands, I'm her mommy now!" Boys are so funny. :-)

I have to work tonight and I think I'm going to take my sketch pad, just in case there are some quiet moments and I have an inspiration to draw two boys and a baby chicken. :-) Or perhaps I'll just draw on the bus on the way to work this afternoon. It's a forty-five minute ride, so I should get in lots of sketches.

I wish I knew how to use watercolors... hm, maybe I'll try that sometime.

Well, I have some Hebrew letters to study...

Shalom,

Samia

I want to go Home

Turns out that the end is always just the beginning. *sigh*

I look back, and I see that I've come so very far, but then I look ahead and I can't even see the end of the road that I'm on. Sometimes I'm not sure if I'm excited or exasperated. Life could be shorter but then I'd miss out on the best parts.

This has been the longest week that I've had in a long time, if not ever. It's been the most difficult month, and It's been the busiest time, but I've had a blast!

My feet are sore, my back is tired, my joints are stiff, my eyes are heavy, my finger hurts, and I'm emotionally drained.

I survived a week of Mom-ness followed by my first week of school in two years, coinciding with a very large conference, consisting of very long hours of very hard work (in between homework and my job of course) and the only damage done was a bit of sunburn, an almost broken finger, sore feet, and the discovery that certain types of hanging ivy plants cause me to itch pretty much all over.

I think I'm a survivor... :-)

*sigh*

I'm so very thankful for Labor Day right now.

My room is trashed and I think I've got a whole load worth of laundry to do, but those grapes look really yummy, so I think the clothes will have to wait. :-)

Oh, by the way...

"Oh, Lord haste the day when my faith shall be sight, the clouds be rolled back as a scroll, the trump shall resound and the Lord shall descend. It is well, it is well with my soul!"

-Samia

Life As I Once Knew It.

My parents are home. The laundry is caught up, there's food all over the counter and my brother's have gone back to throwing their lunches at each other. *sigh*

Today is my first day of school. I have to leave home for my second class in about half an hour. I'll be there from 2:15 until 9:30pm... I should pack myself a sandwich for dinner... and maybe some chips too...

I made dinner for the family tonight, but I won'e be here... I hope they save me some. I made italian meat sauce and elbow noodles and garlic-herb bread. The kitchen smelled wonderful last night while I was baking that bread! :-) Mmmm :-)

Oh dear, look at the time! and the schedule! sheesh! This semester is going to be fun... but not laying-on-the-beach-catching-some-rays kind of fun :-)

Gotta go!

Samia

*sigh* Craziest Weekend

Nothings burning, no one's screaming, the floor is no longer sticky, I finally figured out why the sink smelled like dead fish, the baby is sleeping, and the laundry is done, for now anyway.

It's been a long weekend. Yeah, I know, it's Friday, it's only just started... I know... thanks for the reminder.

Don't get me wrong, this is going to be tons of fun, just, not the laying-on-the-beach-getting-some-rays kind of fun, if you know what I mean.

Trial by fire.

It's not all bad, I mean, for a pyro like me it's super cool! Up close and personal with the flames that purify...

Wow. I sound like I haven't slept in a while... hee hee!

So this weekend I get to try out being a Mom, a part time employee (at two places), a full time nanny, a sister, a conference Food and Beverages Coordinator, a part time student, and myself. All at the same time. Well, technically I'm not a part time student until Monday and I'm not really the Coordinator, I'm just subbing for her until Tuesday afternoon and I'm not really a Mom... I'm subbing for her... and if this sore throat keeps up I'll only have to work one job this weekend instead of two... *sigh*

(that was a happy sigh by the way, and no, I really do mean that, though it's crazy, I am actually enjoying this)

I probably shouldn't be blogging right now, there's a lot to do around here, actually, let me rephrase that.

I definitely shouldn't be blogging right now, there's a lot of things that I need to do, but it's quiet right now and--- sorry, the phone rang. Okay, quiet moment over, I'll tell you about the fun later, right now, I have to go to work...

*sigh*

(okay, that one wasn't so happy, work is not my favorite, I can handle the craziness, but having a real job is not appealing to me...)

See you on the other side of the fire,

Samia

I'm trying.

I'm having motivational issues today...

So I'm blogging.

We had a fellowship after church last night and I had a blast. :-)

I volunteered to help a friend of mine run the bean bag toss. They had put it together with adults in mind (the fellowship was to welcome new college students) but we had a lot of kids try it out.

You know what's funny? The kids were the ones winning prizes. :-P

Somewhere near the end of the evening, after we had run out of prizes, one of the little girls tossed the bean bag and managed to get it stuck in the tiny space between the Sunday School building and the stairwell beside it. It was a very dark, deep, tiny space. I'm pretty sure there were spiders back there. And it was dark.

We made the mistake of turning our backs on the kids throwing bean bags and pretty soon they were throwing bean bags at us! A hilarious war of colorful streaks and shrieks of laughter ensued. :-)

We almost got a couple more bean bags stuck in that tiny space. :-P

We had to call one of the custodians to come and get that lost bean bag and he came over to take a look. It was pretty far back there and our efforts at getting it out had only managed to push it farther back. So he disappeared and soon returned carrying a mop with no head and a wire hanger which proved to be quite successful in the bean bag's rescue.

With the missing bag returned and our attention to the kids resumed we realized that it was about 9pm and well past the time to clean up and go home.

I came home with a watermelon.

And a smile.

Samia

Newsflash: Real Relationships Happen with People. Not Usernames.

How has my day been?

I don't know... I didn't really wake up until just now.

I worked the opening shift, which really isn't as bad as it sounds. I didn't have to be there until 9am... but I didn't think to use some caffeine until noon or so. I do remember testing gold scraps for about an hour though... my fingers are a tiny bit sore now. :-P

Brb, gotta check the hot dogs.

Have you ever heard of White Hots? No? oo that's a big shocker, no not really. Nobody's heard of White Hots. Except the people who eat them and those people live mainly in Rochester. Rochester has a lot of good things- White Hots, the Yankees' minor league team, Highland Park (Lilacs!), history, the Erie Canal, the old Kodak buildings... *sigh*

I've only been back for just over a week and I'm ... vacation-sick? I was gunna say home-sick, but I live here...

I'm going to write a children's book. "Pickles in a Jelly Jar". What do you think?

It occurred to me that I have a ton of funny stories from when I was a kid. My parents bought a house and enlisted my brothers and I to help them fix it up (you can imagine the incidents I'm sure) and then we all packed up and drove all the way across the United States (with no air conditioning) and we've lived out of our car and in a tent and all five of us kids in one room (with the dog of course)... my life would make a pretty funny children's book... :-)

White Hots are done!

Samia

Discovering Myself

I came across this pretty neat website today, and even though the 100 Days is up I think you should still check it out. Miss Elaini-ous. God bless the children in India.

Whilst browsing through the blog of above mentioned site, I discovered another website that instantly caught my fancy. Empowered Traditionalist. What really caught my eye was the description of an E.T. and this post, because it's so not me. I've been thinking about what God expects me to be (seeing that I'm a woman) a lot lately and coming to a lot of convicting conclusions. For instance; in 1 Timothy 2 Paul talks about how women should behave themselves, from how they dress to how they sit quietly in church. He says "... likewise also that the women adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness- with good works. Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness. I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet."

Titus 2 also talks about womanhood, "Older woman, likewise, are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands that the word of God may not be reviled."

This verse really caught my attention last week and has made femininity precious to me, "Let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious." That's 1 Peter 3:4. A gentle and quiet spirit is beautiful to Him... I've been granted another piece of the puzzle that is who I want to be.

So, as I write this post, I'm wearing a T-shirt and jeans, but my hair is brushed and my posture is (attempting) respectful, but most importantly, my heart is longing for the courage to tell myself that it's okay (in fact, it's good) to be a lady and that gentleness is not a sign of weakness, but of strength. My heart is longing for something deeper than my usual wild party and loud joking, something deeper than dressing to impress a certain gender and painting my face and turning myself into someone that is no where near beautiful in God's sight. Because God's sight is the only sight that I should be worried about.

*sigh*

I can do this...

Samia

Haircuts are oh so frightening.

It's been a long week. It's only half over. I've been getting up early to spend some time reading and I've been cleaning out. I think I could have a garage sale all by myself, I've got so much stuff.
I'm waiting for a live webcast to start. It's taking a while. I didn't know about it until this morning. I was cleaning out my inbox and discovered an invitation to a live webcast with Brandon Heath. Cool, huh? Oo. They just put up a message to let us know that it'll be starting in about 30 minutes! I'm a little bit excited about it. :-)
I gave my kid brother a haircut today and taught him how to wash it properly. Hopefully that info will sink in. :-/
The baby has learned a new word. "Dodger". Mom and Dad are kinda big fans. Speaking of which. I got invited to a Dodger game the other day. My response, "You have to understand what I think of the Dodgers. Asking me to go to a Dodger game is like asking me if I want to roll in the mud with the pigs." Thankfully he felt the same way about them, so he wasn't offended. They suck pretty bad. :-P
Well, only a few more minutes now, so I'm off to get a snack before the Webcast starts. :-)
Samia

There were some serious crazies at the Radisson last night...

I'min Chicago.
Figure that one out.
God is giving me a comfort in confusing situations.
Our flight from Rochester to Cleveland was delayed, so we were going to miss our connecting flight in Cleveland to Los Angeles, so Continental Airways was kind enough to transfer us to another flight going to Chicago and then to Los Angeles.
Wait. It get's better.
So we made it to Chicago. But there were technical difficulties, so we had to wait an extra 25 minutes in the terminal.
And then they tell us.
Our flight's been cancelled.
Joy.
So we have to go to another terminal so that we can be put on the standby list for another flight to Los Angeles. By the way, the list was 38 people long. So we waited for about 45 minutes more just so that they could announce that the flight was full and they didn't have any other flights to LA that night.
So we stood in line again.
This time it was so that we could rebook and get United paid vouchers for a hotel and $30 worth of food at either the Radisson or the Airport.
So I slept on a Sleep Number bed last night.
And today, we opted out of flying home at 6am (after having been standing around the airport until near midnight last night) and we don't fly home until 5:45pm.
So we get to walk around Chicago.
I've never been to Chicago before. At least, I've never been out of the airport in Chicago before.
This is gunna be fun I think.
I'll be sure to take some pictures.
:-)
Samia

The word "Goodbye" always makes me think of Alfalfa...

I'm totally the kind of person that only reads blogs if there's lots of pictures and not very many words... sorry. :-)
This is the last day. The plane leaves at 6:55pm tonight. Sadness.
I've hardly told any of what I've done in the last three weeks. Three weeks! I've been here three weeks! It feels like I arrived only yesterday, but I've gotten so much done since I've been here anyway.
The basement still looks cluttered, but it's much improved since we've come here. The attic is a tad neater and tidier and the garage has been organized a bit and a few loads of old things have been taken to the second hand store in the village.
Mom and I did some cleaning out and then held a garage sale. Or, well, she held a garage sale. I went for a walk. The Farmer's market is a dangerous place when you have a $20 in your pocket. That mennonite banana bread was really yummy. :-) I took lots of picture with Grampa's SLR and hopefully I'll be able to get them onto the computer when I get home. I have to find a place where they'll develop and scan the negs onto a disk or something for me though. I don't trust anyone to do my prints for me.
That Saturday night, Mom and I went camping. Putting up a borrowed tent in the dark is quite the experience. :-) But we did it! and then we stoked a fire and had hot dogs and hot cocoa and then went to bed. I think I'm getting old. And I don't think that just because people keep exclaiming, "Agh! you're so old!" (people that haven't seen me in ten years, that is). No, I think I'm getting old because sleeping on the ground is not so comfortable anymore. We camped Saturday night and then crashed on the floor at a friend's house on Sunday and Monday nights and by Tuesday afternoon I was quite tuckered out.
Oh and it didn't help that air mattress' lose all their hot air when I'm around...
;-)
Monday. :-) Monday was full of adventure. I can't wait to post some pictures. :-)
We went to Wellesley Island, NY. <--You should click on this link. :-) We walked around the village on the island and saw all of the island houses. <---You should click on that link too. :-) (these sites kinda suck but it was the best I could find, it's not exactly a technologically advanced neighborhood and I don't blame them. I wouldn't be on the internet if this was out my front door either!) We saw the Wellesley Island Hotel and almost fell asleep on the porch. And then we found our way over the the Boldt Yacht House only to discover that it's no $31 to see the Castle on Hart Island, but only $9! Hoorah! So we quickly paid our dues and hopped aboard the ferry to go see the Boldt Castle! (you'll have to google that one... I'm done searching links for now.) I hope to be able to put up the pictures that I took. It was pretty darn cool. :-)
On the way back to Gramma and Grampa's Mom and I stopped and had Friendly's for dinner. If you don't know what Friendly's is... get a life, dude. :-P (I know, that last link was Wikipedia, which is not reliable at all, but it has the story) We actually didn't get ice cream, but the loaded fries were so good that ice cream wasn't needed :-) Speaking of ice cream... I could use some right now. I think ice cream is my new favorite hobby... I'll have to walk over to Lickety-Split later, before we leave for LA.
*sigh*
So this is it... I think I've rambled enough and finally come to the last blog post of this trip... Should I buy that $25 bottle of perfume? It smells just like lilacs...
Samia

"Well she's a pleasant perky person!"

So my time is almost up. Sadness. :'-(
But it's ok. I'll come back. :-)
It's raining right now. I love the sound and the smell and the feel and the breeze and the shiny wet pavement. It sounds like music.
I mowed the lawn yesterday. I haven't mowed a lawn in like six years or something. It was kinda nice. Say Im' crazy... but I kinda like mowing the lawn. I worked up a bit of a sweat and the cut grass smelled so good and I deepened my flip flop tan just a little. And yes, it is a flip flop tan, it's not dirt. In fact, as of yesterday where I wasn't tan I was green because of the fresh cut grass!
I went to two differnt family gatherings this past weekend. My Mom's Dad's Family Reunion (they have one every year) and the next day we went to my Great Aunt's Cottage on the lake (that is my Dad's Mom's Sister's Cottage on the lake). So I got to see a whole bunch of cousins and cousins once removed on Saturday and a whole bunch of cousins once removed and second cousins once removed on Sunday! Figure that one out. I did. I managed (along with some help from my cousins) to figure out who all of the people at the family reunion was and how they were realted to me and I even learned some new things about some people that weren't there. I have cousins in Seatle and some in Florida and some in Ohio... I don't know their names though... but they are all kids of kids or just kids of my Grandad's siblings. Does that make any sense at all?
Sigh. I have a LOT of cousins. My Grandad comes from a family with eight kids and most of them had three or more children. His sister had like eight herself and he had five and each of them have two or more children, my Aunt has four and my Mom has five... and that's just my mother's side of the family! Sheesh!
Well, enough rambling, I have a walk to tak to the mailbox around the corner in the rain and then some more cellar cleaning to do. Fun times, right?
Samia

It would have been easier with the lights on...

So... I've been a very busy girl these last few days or so!
Camping, road trips, ice cream, bugs, baseball, cat pee, painting, Wii, movies, garage sales, antiques that I wish I could fit in my suitcase... you name it!
But I don't think I"m going to write about my week just yet. Dinner's almost on the table and my mind is elsewhere anyway.
Life has taken some interesting turns lately. I've spent a lot of time thinking things through up in the attic... that room is going to hold some odd memories from now on...
"I almost had my heart broke
I almost lost my faith
I saw that I was fearful and I stared it in the face
I found out that I really hope that Jesus comes back soon
I discovered that I don't know anything in that room"
Samia

That sounds like a blog post title...

It just stopped raining.
:-)
It's been raining since about seven thirty.
<3
I'm all wet.
*happy sigh*
And I have heart burn.
I've never had heart burn before.
It's kinda uncomfortable.

Today is Friday. Lot's is happening today. Or at least, lots was suppose to happen today. Not so much is actually happening though. The garage sale started about an hour ago, even though it rained cats and dogs, people still came. Umbrella's and all. I was supposed to go for a walk around town today. I have my Grandad's camera and I was going to take some pictures... but I think I'll wait until the sun comes back again. :-)
I was going to get some ice cream too... :-(
I've had so much ice cream in the last week and a half, it's ridiculous! The first thing I had to eat when I got here was a peanut butter sundae at Friendly's (I <3 Friendly's, btw).
I think I like ice cream. :-)

Yesterday we worked on the basement for a while and then we moved some stuff out to the garage and rearranged it for the sale. Somewhere after one o'clock, around the time I finished dumping the rat poison in the garbage can, Mom looked up from in between the riding mower and the snow blower and said, "Do you wanna take Dad's canoe down to the canal and go for a ride?"
Well, of course, I thought, "Sure! That sounds great! We should do that some time" But she meant right then. "Wait, right now?" I asked.
"Yeah. Right now"
So we put the big barn red canoe on the wheely thingamabob and walked down to the canal for a ride. It was nice. I haven't been in a canoe since the last time I was here in the summer... no wait... I did canoe in Texas last summer, just once. Nevermind. :-) Anyway. we went a ways down the canal, looking silly for the first bit, because it had been a while since either of us had paddled anything. But once we got the hang of it again it was nice.
I hope that Kai came out of the canal eventually. Her master looked a little frustrated that yelling, "Heel, Kai!" wasn't working... :-P He even tried throwing some sticks, but that dog was just lovin' the water too much! :-)
When we got back to the house we cleaned up real quick and drove out to Victor to meet my Aunt at a Tea House. I'd never been to a Tea House before. This one was set in a Historic Italianate Mansion with a big half wrap porch. The windows stretched floor to ceiling and the front staircase was all beautiful cherry wood! They had little tea table set up all over the house and a few on the front porch. So we had luncheon (hee hee, isn't that a cute little word?) and Gramma had coffee. But nobody had tea :-P And then we looked around. Though it was a Tea House, it was also an antique boutique or something of the like. The place was chock full of antiques, handmade crafts and dolls, books, dresses, vintage aprons (I wanted to get one soooo bad... but I'll just make a look a like when I get home, I guess) antique hankies, artwork, furniture, you name it! I got a birthday present for somebody who's birthday is the day I come home too. But I won't tell what I got her :-) I hope she likes it. I like it a lot... and I think she'll like it... she's not an overly sensible person and it's not an overly sensible gift.... that's not an insult by the way. Overly sensible people live in a terribly sad and lonely world. We see the world in a little bit more creative a light. :-)
Well, when we got home Mom and I went for a walk. She was going to show me a neat little store, but it was closed by the time we got there. So we walked around town instead. We walked past the firestation and the old churches and the Green Lantern Inn and eventually found our way down to the old Fairport "Burying Ground". The sign said that it was first made a cemetary in 1820 but the "Burying Ground Society" made it an official "Burying Ground" in 1826. The earliest date we found on a grave was 1817. That kinda rocked my socks a little. :-) The youngest person that I found buried there was only one year and five months old... wonder if it was because of disease or something... hm...
From there we wandered back over to the canal and the lift bridge and caught whiff of the smell of greasy NY pizza... so we had to stop. :-) We ended up getting mozzarella sticks and hot buffalo wings... and now I have heartburn. :-)
Well, I ought to go give Mom some company... she's still sitting out in the garage alone... :-)
Samia

Advice is only for when you know the answer but you wish you didn't.

My life right now.

I love Fairport, NY. I love it like Garfield loves lasagna, like Bugs Bunny loves carrots, like flowers love sunshine, like fat kids love cake. I love it here.
I found a 98 year old newspaper in the attic earlier this week.
We've been cleaning out my Grandad's basement. Nothing's really moved down there since 1967... the year they moved in. I found a newspaper clipping from that year underneath the lapidary bench yesterday. My Grandad is really cool. He has more power tools and wrenches and hand saws and nuts and bolts and screws than you could possibly imagine.
He collects rocks. He used to mine gems and gold and such and he has quite a few cases of his findings, some in settings and some loose.
He carves wood. And soapstone. I think it would be cool to carve soapstone. He has all sorts of neat little carvings all over the living room and a whole bunch of half finished projects down in the basement. I cleaned the cobwebs off of a half finished carving of Santa Claus and a headless duck (the head gets screwed on when the generally form has been completed).
He likes ducks. He's carved a lot of ducks. My Grandmother paints them. There are several sitting on the shelf above my head right now.
He keeps all of his nuts and bolt and screws and nails and washers and the like in coffee cans. The basement is littered with half filled coffee cans. :-)
Company's here.
Samia

I'm the one who's a tragedy...

Tuesday, July 19th, 2011... *sigh*
I woke up at about 4am... the alarm went off at 5...
Suitcase packed, breakfast gobbled, goodbye's said. The sun was begining to show it's rays.
I made it to the Flyaway just before the 6:15am bus took off. The driver, Jose, apologized for not having cookies. Apparently the Flyaway couldn't afford them. Sadness. :-(
WE made good time on the freeway and I stepped off the bus at LAX around 7am. But I didn't check in for my flight until around 7:30 becuase I got off at the wrong stop. Fail #1.
So I walk like a half a mile or something silly like that, from Stop #1 to Stop #7... For those of you who don't know, that's the entire length of LAX... silly me...
I find the check in for United Airlines. I insert my ID into the automated machine, and... my flight leaves at 1:15pm??? what? no! it's supposed to leave at 9:30am! so I can meet my plane in Philly at 7pm!! Oh no! I desperately tried to wave down one of the attendants but with little luck. After a little patience was put into play I finally got someone's attention only to find that she had no idea what was happening either! "Well... let's just hit 'This is my flight' and find out what happens...". So, I still don't know exactly what was going on.. the screen said one thing and the tickets said something else and the tickets were correct. I didn't miss my plane. Whew. So all's good. For now.
My favorite part's next: Airport Security. *sigh* I followed the generally flow of traffic and the instruction of uniformed people (that I'm sure got up on the wrong side of the bed) and somehow managed to, very politely, get myself into the line that went straight to the X-ray machine.
You've got to understand something here; I've always sworn that I'd never let them X-ray me or pat me down. I'd rather walk away from my flight. But I always said that I'd slug a dude if he really deserved it too... so my word doesn't really mean that much. I hope whomever was doing the screening could see my angry face with the X-ray machine, cuz I was wearin' it! Fail #2.
Long morning + no breakfast +the frustration of LAX security + the frustration of simply being me = I didn't even bother tying my shoes until I'd found my gate. I bet I looked pretty sad walking to my seat.
I tied my shoes and then found my way to a delicious piece of Starbuck's coffee cake- highlight of my day... well sort of... it did get better... but not for a while yet.
Once on my first flight I discovered that mine was the center seat... so I took it and nervously waited to find out who I'd learn patience and kindness from during the next four and a half hours... The first one was a tall, broad shouldered, young man with a bit of a southern air. He had no accent but he had that sweet, all-American baby face sort of look, if you know what I mean. He had the window seat. He motioned from the isle that it was his seat, so I jumped up out of my seat and stepped into the isle so he could slide in... actually, no, not really... first I jumped up and bashfully discovered that I was buckled in already and then I fumbled with my seat belt (you'd think I'd never unbuckled one before) and then I stepped into the isle... Fail #3.
My second Airmate was a middle aged gentleman of possibly middle eastern decent, wearing slacks, a button up, and spectacles.
He slept the majority of the time.
So did the other guy.
It was a long flight.
They played a documentary on the demolition of the Old Yankee's Stadium, which I was completely fascinated by and then they played Jane Eyre. I've seen it before and it's no secret how disappointed I was by it. It's a great movie, but they missed the point of the book. I might have enjoyed the movie, but I didn't feel like feeling sad, so I watched without the sound.
We arrived in Philadelphia about 15 minutes ahead of time but had to wait in the air a few minutes longer because of a runway back up caused by the weather.
It was 98 degrees and raining torrents in Philadelphia.
Can you say "Sticky"?
I found my way to a restroom to drench my head in cool water and call my Mother, wishing all the while that I'd stowed some deodorant in my carry on... it was hot.
I got to my next gate on time only to discover that my flight had been delayed about half an hour. We were supposed to leave Philly at 6:50pm, but by the time they let us get seated it was almost 7:30pm.
*happy sigh* I got a window seat.
Next to a British guy.
He slept the whole time.
And by the whole time, I mean for the whole hour and a half that we sat on the tarmac and then for the whole hour flight after that. We were supposed to arrive in Rochester, NY, at 8:30pm, but we weren't even in the air until 9pm... The wait wouldn't have been so bad, but the guy behind me gave his state a bad reputation. Yes, the flight attendant was a bit tyrranical but it's rude to swear at or about people. Especially when the quiet, polite, little white boy flight attendant came back to apologize to you on her behalf...
*sigh* He needed a chill pill. Or two.
I finally arrived in Rochester, NY, around 10pm EST!
My Grandparents were kind enough to meet me at the airport, but unfortunately my suitcase wasn't...
So we went to Friendly's for ice cream sundaes and the airport delivered it right to the front door the next morning!
*exhale*
So that was my day... it was a long day... I'm still catching up from it... as you can see... I started this post a few days ago and am just now finishing it... *sigh*
I'll tell you about my favorite place in the world later this week :-)
Goodnight all!
-Samia

Wait... who are the Redwings?

I'll have to google that in a minute. I may be going to a baseball game tomorrow night. The RedWings are playing (?). You know... The Rochester RedWings... in New York.
Surprise!
I'm flying to NY tomorrow morning! For a whole three weeks! Eek! Mom and I are going to visit family and I planned my flight a little bit wrong... so I'll be flying there tomorrow morning and mom will fly tomorrow night. So, in the meantime, my Aunt and I are going to hang out! Possibly at a baseball game. I guess her work buddies have a private box or something for the game which is pretty exciting. It's only minor league, it's not like seeing the Yankees play, but still pretty cool. Boy I'd give anything to see a Yankees game... specifically in Yankee Stadium... wouldn't that just be the best?
Anywho... so, I'm supposed to be packing... I mean, I'm mostly done packing... but I'm tired of packing... but I have to work tonight. So I really can't put it off... *sigh*
I. Am. So. Excited.
*sigh*
I still have to pack my toothbrush... my face wash and lotion, make up, bathrobe... shampoo... M&ms... :-D I think that's about it... I suppose I can put it off a little bit.
:-D
I should go wash up for work...
*sigh*
Samia

If you're a cockroach and I evict you I'm not going to throw your stuff in the dumpster...

Goodbye Henry.
Good riddance.
*sigh*
I'll be seeing the new "Henry" on Monday, I'm sure.
You see, Henry is the cockroach that lives in the bathroom at work. Or, rather, "Henry" is the cockroaches that live in the bathroom at work. We only seem to see them one at a time and though we've killed several... well... like I said, I'll be seeing the next Henry on Monday, I'm sure.
Henry is about and inch and a quarter long.
Henry makes Alin the Bean climb the desk like a beanstalk.
I was minding my own business, taking out the trash, when I found Henry tonight. Under the trash can. In a corner where a small plastic cup was the only thing I could reach him with. I quickly decided that the plastic cup was a bad idea.
When I was a kid I wouldn't have hesitated to catch an inch and a quarter long cockroach in a translucent plastic cup using nothing but my hands and a magazine. But there's something about becoming a woman that does away with that complacency towards creepy crawlies. And the Bean's screaming didn't help put me at ease much either. I even yelled at her to stop screaming, to which she replied with, "Ok. Aaaaaaaghhhhh!!!".
"Ok, ok, I have an idea" she finally said, "give me that trash can, you scare him out into the middle of the room here and I'll trap him under it!" I didn't say what I was thinking ("Really. I don't think you could successfully throw a ball onto the floor right now...") and I handed the trash can up to her (she was standing on an office chair).
So, I squirmed and swatted at Henry with the magazine, which was quite affective in making him run straight at me and getting Alin to scream some more... or maybe that was me... hm... After a few headless chicken type turns about the room Henry dove to safety in the dark, dusty, corner beside the jeweler's bench.
We gave up the chase. We couldn't see him anymore so we felt better, though, it was still a bit disturbing that he was out of the bathroom. Henry never ventures out of the bathroom. Never.
About ten minutes later something possessed me to clean out that dark, dusty, corner beside the jeweler's bench. Hm, metal shelves, interesting. Ooh, ring stock forms from 2008, wonder if they remember that's missing. What the heck? a roll of brown paper. Nothing else in the corner but dust. Uh oh. Where's Henry??? Then I remembered the brown paper. I pointed my theory out to Alin. She was down from the chair, but squirmed none the less. We stood there for a moment considering what we could do about it. I considered just carrying the paper down the way to the garbage shoot. But what if Henry wasn't even in there and I just waisted a good roll of brown paper? Or, what if Henry was in there and decided to come out on the way to the garbage shoot? I don't think I'd like that very much. *lightbulb!* I had it! I told Alin the plan and she opened up a trash bag and held it very, very, gingerly, so as to hardly touch it at all (I don't blame her for what I was about to do). I carefully picked the paper roll up by one and and violently shook the other end above the garbage bag.
*pause* This is the point where our story comes to a climax, so naturally, there is music in the background, ours was Alin's screams and squeals... *play*
Sure enough, out came Henry. Right into the garbage bag. Score one for the little girls dancing on their toes. The next ten seconds or so was a whirlwind rush of the bag switching hands and then a secure knot being tied in the top, followed by my hasty departure to the garbage shoot with our dear Henry suffocating in my hand ( I SO hope he was suffocating!).
Henry is now in cockroach heaven. Or, as Alin said, unfortunately he's not. But I bet he thinks he is... lot'sa garbage down that garbage shoot...
Samia

Mexican, Margaritas, and Midnight...

Before you freak- I did not have a margarita. I had regular cola. It was my over-21-coworkers that had margaritas. :-)
The folks at work like to go to restaurants after closing. I don't usually go. But today was special. We were celebrating Alin the Bean and Martha's one year anniversary of working at the store. So I thought it would be nice of me to go. :-)
I had fun. The last time I went out with them I think I was a bit quiet... a little awkward... I'd never hung out with legal people before :-P But tonight the boss was there and a couple of the girls had brought their boyfriends, so it just seemed altogether more comfortable.
So two extra large sampler plates and several drinks later Alin leans over and whispers to me, "Hey, Pst!" She points to her boyfriend, "I love this guy!"
I know, Alin, I know. :-) She was having fun. It's a good thing he was driving. :-)
Well... I did have a fun time, we had some goofy conversations. But I think I'm going to stick to just every once in a little while. I don't plan on drinking, so I don't need too much exposure to it.
Well... that cola had caffeine in it... I should be sleeping... I've got lots to do this weekend... packing for and impromptu trip to NY and such (:-D) So I'm going to try to sleep now...
Try... hm... I have to finish reading that book...
:-P
Samia

A Day Worth Recounting...

Sunday. Ah, Sunday...
I missed my alarm... or maybe I didn't set it... I was out cold until near 11am. I was supposed to be at work at 8:10am. Oops.
They say that the average head cold lasts for 7-10 days and ought to be no more than 14... I'm going on... let's see here... 18 days... yeah, I that's about right.
So I got up and frantically made a call to my supervisor's answering machine apologizing for not having showed up.
I cleaned my room. It hasn't been clean in a while... well, it has, but it get's messy pretty fast.
My phone rang. It was J-pie, was I coming over? Oops. I was supposed to go over for some ping pong and a movie, I forgot. So I took my Mom's mini van and drove over to her house.
We played ping pong. We have mad skills. I mean that in a lunatic sort of mad way. :-) It was fun. :-P J-pie's Mom came out and asked her to put gas in her truck, so she could take it on the road, so I offered to drive behind her to the station, just in case, because it was driving on merely fume's.
The van wouldn't start.
Put the key in, foot on the brake (just in case), turn key... *click, click, click* nothing. Nada. Very quiet.
Uh oh.
So J-pie made it to the station on her own and came back. I asked for a jump, so she pulled the Lexus out into the street and I hooked up the jumper cables.
I have done this before, quite a few times actually.
There were four of us 20ish year old girls standing there. I felt so brave dealing with car engines and electricity... but only because I had a worried audience... on any other day it would have been no big deal. Like I said before, I've done this before, quite a few times.
Red on positive of dead car. Red on positive of running engine. Black on negative of run--- *scream!!!*
Thank you Nat. That was really funny. I'm laughing so hard. Well, actually I was laughing, but not that hard. :-D
I finished hooking the jumper cables up without incident and my engine started up with a bit of a groan and cough. Cables unhooked and put away. Lexus returned to it's place. I took the van down the street, Mom said the battery was just dead and if we jumped it and took it for a ride on the freeway that the alternator would bring back it's life.
We made it half a block.
She coughed and sputtered and died. No lights, no engine... nothing.
Fail.
So Nat and I get out and call J-pie on her cellphone and she and Taylor come running down the street. Nat's never pushed a dead car before. Glad to have broadened her sphere of experience for her.
Did you know that when there is no electricity, there is no power steering? I like power steering. I'm so glad we normally have it. My arms are sore and tired.
Let's just pull it off to the side and Triple A will come and get it tomorrow, we say. So we push it to the side of the street. Well, they push, I steer (which was almost just as difficult, I think :-P). But the sign above our heads says "No Parking Mondays 12noon-2pm - Street Cleaning" Oh. But the sign across the street says Tuesdays. So we say, "Let's push it into that driveway and then back it up and park it on the other side of the street in front of Gladys' house." But the power steering isn't working... so it was a pretty intense K-turn. Over a speed bump. I think I had the easier job for sure. Sorry Ladies.
Job done. Car locked. And we walk away. *sigh* well... that was interesting...
So we go back to J-pie's house and watch The Princess and The Frog. Because we're so growed up like that. It was cute. I will never kiss a frog. A basketball maybe, and only if it's wearing a Stetson. But no frogs.
After the movie we all drove over to the church in J-pie's Lexus. Because my car was kaput. Nat and I stayed and Taylor and J-pie went home. We were late, so we sneaked in quiet like.
I didn't feel very good. I made it through two and a half baptisms and then I sneaked right back out. Mom was in the nursery, so I stole her keys and drove home in the Camry. I sat down on the couch and then woke up an hour later to the smell of chicken burgers. I went back to the church to get Mom and then back home to sleep some more.
It's 11am again... I think I need a nap...
Samia

Love is not Boastful

My first impression of this sentence: Love doesn't shove it's accomplishments in other people's faces.
Boast: to speak with pride. That's why Paul is able to use the word Boast when speaking of the cross of Christ in Galatians 6:14. So the English word, Boast, doesn't really do this verse justice... The American Standard Version Bibles uses instead the word "vaunteth" which means to brag or to boast "vaingloriously of"... which is excessive pride over one's own achievements.
Love is not consumed with self. That seems to be the theme here... Love is selfless.
Love doesn't talk about what it has or what it's getting. It isn't obsessed with self. Love doesn't make itself the center of attention (ouch). Love is discreet...
Love is selfless... "devoted to others' welfare and interests and not one's own."
Hm...
Samia

Love is not Envious

I've been learning more and more what this one means recently.
It's hard not to envy!
Dictionary.com (I know... I'm so lazy...) describes envy as "a feeling of discontent or covetousness with regard to another's advantages, success, possessions, etc." Oh how I have felt envy so much! I'm not sure whether I feel more envious now than before or if I'm just noticing it now because I've been reading about it... When I was a kid I held this sort of false humility in being not envious- but I really was... my Mom likes to say that I'm a "snob snob", meaning I'm a snob to snobs... I do whatever is contrary to the trend. Including, but not limited to, acting disgusted or haughty over people when I'm really just jealous of them.
That doesn't appear to be very clear... hm, oh well, I mostly just write for the sake of getting my thoughts out... not so much for the sake of being understood. Lol.
Anyway, my thoughts on envy: Love doesn't envy, so, love is not envious of what others have, not discontent "with regard to another's advantages, success, possessions, etc." So, from this, we can state that Love is content.
Ouch, that one hurts. Do I really know love if I envy?
I'm finding that Love seems to be something that is a chase. It's a fight, and you can't give up or you haven't got it at all... hm... I'm starting to appear more and more lazy to myself...
Food for thought...
Samia

Love is Kind

The word implies to me a gentleness and care, a softness and genuine, heartfelt tenderness. It is a verb word (if you know what i mean). Kindness is not a state of mind, but it comes from a state of mind. Only God gives the strength needed to be truly and honestly kind (Habakkuk 3:19a). Love is thoughtful, love is a servant.... actually, Love is a volunteer servant, because it is servanthood that is honestly given.
-Samia

Love is Patient

I spent some time reading through 1 Corinthians 13 last night. It's a passage that is so well known to me... but I didn't really know it all that well... make sense?
So I went through verses 4-8a and I looked at each word. I thought about what the words actually mean by themselves and I found that the whole was much more comprehensive than I had originally thought.
Here is the passage: "Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends."
So I thought I'd do a mini series from this and just share my thoughts. Here is what was brought to my mind by the first word.

Love is Patient: "True love waits" I don't need to be anxious, God is in control and so whether I want to or not, I will wait. Not only must I merely wait, but i must not be tired by waiting. Patience isn't pretending to be content. Patience is being content- so, Love is Content.

Maybe tonight I'll give you my thoughts on Kindness...
-Samia

Learning to Listen

So I haven't blogged in a while, what else is new?
Well, I'm learning lots... unfortunately one generally has to be humbled before getting the message, which is not too much fun... :(
Is is worth it? Yes. Is it painful? Yes. Do I wish things had happened differently? No. :) I'm learning that my mistakes, no matter how serious, have a hand in my sanctification. I love 2 Corinthians 4 where Paul mentions that we have the glory of God in "earthen vessels to show that the surpassing power belongs to Him and not to us". When I mess up, and I do often, it gives glory to God because it shows how incapable I am on my own. Does that make me feel better about having messed up in the first place? No, but this reminds me not to lose hope; in verse 8 Paul reminds us that though it's hard, it's not the end of the line. "We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed." Why? Look at verse 16, "Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."
Hm... I'm chewing on my own thoughts now... I suppose that's a good way to go to bed.
~Samia

Restoring the English Language- One Word at a Time.

The word of the day is found in an excerpt of Jane Eyre, written by Charlotte Bronte (a highly recommended read).

"You look very much puzzled, Miss Eyre: and though you are not pretty any more than I am handsome, yet a puzzled air becomes you; besides it is convenient, for it keeps those searching eyes of yours away from my physiognomy, and busies them with the worsted flowers of the rug; so puzzle on."

Physiognomy as described in Webster's Unabridged Dictionary, the Second Edition:

"Phys-i-og'no-my, n. (from Gr. physiognomonia; physis, nature, and gnomon, one who knows, from stem of gignoskein, to know.)
1. The practice of trying to judge character and mental qualities by observation of bodily, especially facial features.
2.The face; facial features and expression, especially as supposedly indicative of character.
3. Apparent characteristics; outward features or appearance."

I think I like this word. If only is wasn't so hard to wrap my tongue around! It is a word to describe staring at a person but without being rude or creepy. Just to look and ponder what sort of person that they might be. I think that, this word, if employed more often in the modern common vernacular, might ease the indifference that we tend to extend to other people and soften the emotional response that we feel upon being stared at!
With the deterioration of the English language has also come the deterioration of etiquette. I suppose that it is general laziness among the whole population that has caused us to lose the dignity of yester-year. What could we do to bring that dignity back?

How about a little math...

What do you get when you take two best friends,



add some sand,



some sky,



and some sun,



and then throw in a few more people,



some targets,



some snacks,



and some fire arms... ?





School's out for the weekend!!



<3 ~Samia

This is my week...

Post #122

Do you ever get that feeling like your head is really heavy? You know, like, you're just very aware of gravity? Ugh. Isn't it fun?
I have a headache, a stuffy nose, a cough, and a super sore throat. I am so tired and I only woke up about two and a half hours ago.
Now my fingers are tired from typing. Lol. :-D
I got to meet Rebecca St. James on Friday. She signed my CD. And I got to have my picture taken with her. She put her arm over my shoulders and my phone vibrated. I hope she didn't feel it. LOL She gave me hope when it comes to my music- she doesn't play any instruments, but she writes the music anyway. She said that she hears the notes in her head. I don't hear the notes in my head... and I don't really read music, but I kind of play a little. And I do hear music in my head... does that count? :-P
Okay... nap time...
<3<3<3
Samia

Nothing Else To Do

Don't laugh. Please. Just tell me what you think. Please. And feel free to leave comments on what to do with sore fingers from learning guitar... :-)

Can't believe I just put that up... ah, the embarrassment... :-/
Samia

Epiphany: God is in Control.

Doesn't that just make you smile? It makes me smile, in fact, it's what's been getting me out of bed in the mornings lately. It's a good thought to wake up to. :-)
Funny how those thing just hit you. You could have been told a million times and yet when everyone stops saying it... that's when you hear it. I heard it in the dark- sitting in my room, on the floor, with the lights out, and nobody there but God and me. I betcha I make the angels roll their eyes... I'm so dang slow sometimes. But that's good- it reminds me that God is God and I am most definitely not! :-D
1 Corinthians 4:7 "But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God and not of us." <3

He is here.

Psalm 55:22 Cast all your anxieties and cares on the Lord and He will sustain you. He will never let the righteous be shaken.
1 Peter 5:7 Cast all you cares on the Lord for He cares for you.
Matthew 11:28 Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

"Oh. Well, this is someone else's daughter Sam."

I got my first non-family phone call on my cell phone this week.
Wrong number.
:-(
She was looking for her daughter- Sam. She was a little confused when I said I was Sam. I don't sound like her Sam apparently. When I figured out she was looking for a different Sam, I said, "Oh! Well, this is someone else's Sam!"
She thought it was funny.
:-)
Tomorrow is Valentine's Day.
I love Valentine's day- it's so much fun to hate.
:-P
I wore black today.
I made broken heart cookies yesterday. It was fun. :-D
Yay for the anti-pink!
Samia

So- What Is Next?

I wanted to post the most recent blog from Girl Talk- still discussing fears...

The Next Thing
There's at least one more "weapon" we must learn to wield in our fight against fear: obedience.

We fight fear, not only with prayer and promises, but with action that declares to God and everyone else: "I will not let this fear dictate my life."

This advice comes from Elisabeth Elliot (again) in the form of an old poem (emphasis mine):

“Many a questioning, many a fear,
Many a doubt, hath its quieting here.
Moment my moment, let down from Heaven,
Time, opportunity, guidance, are given.
Fear not tomorrows, Child of the King,
Trust them with Jesus, ‘DO THE NEXT THING.’
Do it immediately; do it with prayer;
Do it reliantly, casting all care;
Do it with reverence, tracing His Hand
Who placed it before thee with earnest command.
Stayed on Omnipotence, safe ’neath His wing,
Leave all resultings, ‘DO THE NEXT THING.’”
--author unknown

As an act of faith, I must pray, "Lord, I believe you are going to deliver me from this fear. I am asking for your help. I am going to keep asking for your help. I am going to keep speaking truth. But in the meantime, I'm going to do what you've called me to do."

Then I have to get off the couch and do it. Something. Anything. The next thing.

So what's your next thing? It might be to simply get out of bed and take a shower. It might be to get in the car and drive the carpool. It might be to go talk to your teenager or be consistent to teach your toddler to come "right away, all the way, and with a happy heart."

Whatever your mothering fear, cast it on the Lord and do the next thing. And, as JC Ryle encourages parents: "It is in the going forward that God will meet you."

"Run, Emily, Run."

Ecclesiastes 12:8 "Vanity of vanities, saith the preacher, all is vanity."

I've been sitting here for a while, trying to come up with words to convey what I'm thinking/feeling. But I haven't found any.
I'm very... content and hopeful right now.It's been a good day and I'm having trouble caring about myself right now (which of course, is a good thing). I'm not even sure what happened...
:-)
We had a great sermon this evening in church. We were in Ecclesiastes 12. The last chapter of Ecclesiastes where Solomon comes to the end of his thoughts and concludes with this:
Ecclesiastes 12:13 "So, let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God and keep His commandments: for this is the whole duty of man."
Then the teacher quoted a commentator (who's name I cannot, for the life of me, recall, sorry) who said this:
"How shall we arrive at this blessed fear? Let us set God ever in our eye and study His immensity... Let us pray for this fear of God which is the root of all holiness..."
I've been quite distracted the last few weeks and this sermon got my attention and totally reminded my of where my attention should be.
And then....
I read this. It's an old post from The Rebelution Blog. I'm glad I came across it.
I'm not going to post the whole thing... It's kinda long- but follow the link above and go read it!
I've kinda been stuck the last few... well, years! I was basing everything on how I felt and that's not what God has commanded me to do.
So- I have a To Do list sitting next to me which will be addressed first thing in the morning. Right now, I'm going to bed- sweet dreams world! I don't need them, not tonight!
:-)
Samia

Facing My Fears

After writing the title to this post my youngest brother runs by and asks, "You have fears?"... evidently I've done a better job of keeping them to myself than I had thought.
Well- yes, I have fears. In fact, I have many fears. I've held onto them, kept them to myself, and denied them. But they are there and they are not mine to bear.
Today I was reading Girl Talk and getting caught up with the blog and I came across some old posts that stuck out to me. My biggest fears are things that I don't know or understand- like the future, strangers, and dark water. They are the types of things I should be trusting God about- things that worry me and really shouldn't at all!
So, here are the blog posts from Girl Talk- and I hope I can take it all to heart and trust God for everything- even when I feel that I have reasons for being fearful. Because God trumps all of those reasons.

Learning to Trust
"Recently, I heard a story about a woman who was gripped by fear in the middle of a dangerous storm. She got on her knees and asked God to help her trust Him, and instantly her fears vanished. She got up from her knees, got into bed, and fell asleep. Just like that.
"I wish that would happen to me more often!" I thought. But I don't usually feel less fearful the instant I pray or read Scripture. And then I worry that I'm doing something wrong or (mistakenly) assume that God's solution for anxiety "isn't working."
But my fearful feelings don't mean that God hasn't answered my prayers. Instead, as Elisabeth Elliot explains, "[God] wants us to learn to use our weapons."
He wants me to learn to persevere in prayer, he wants me to form habits of casting cares (1 Pet. 5:7) and befriending faithfulness (Ps. 37:3). He wants me to become proficient at speaking truth to myself. He wants me to learn to trust Him, even when I don't feel like it.
So if you think God has abandoned you in your fight against fear, think again. The ongoing fight isn't a sign that He's forgotten you, but that He's teaching you to trust. "
A Good Laugh
"In addition to tuning out our fears and turning up the volume on truth, we must fight fear with laughter. Sound ridiculous, even a little irreverent?
Irreverence is precisely the point. We must not dignify our fears--sin-generated, false predictions of a graceless and God-less future--by giving them the attention and obedience due only to God and His Word. Laughing at our fears is entirely appropriate, because up against God's promises they not only look, but actually are, ridiculous.
The Proverbs 31 woman doesn't take herself, or her fears, too seriously: 'She laughs at the future in contrast with being worried or fearful about it' (ESV Study Bible note, Pr. 31:25). This may sound flippant or naive if we don't already know her to be a woman of diligence, wisdom, and strength. She trusts God, and so she laughs.
'One of Satan’s great lies is that God—and goodness—is joyless and humorless,' explains Randy Alcorn:
'In fact, it’s Satan who’s humorless. Sin didn’t bring him joy; it forever stripped him of joy. In contrast, envision Jesus with his disciples. If you cannot picture Jesus teasing them and laughing with them, you need to reevaluate your theology of Creation and Incarnation. We need a biblical theology of humor that prepares us for an eternity of celebration, spontaneous laughter, and overflowing joy.'
Laughter, not fear-filled wonderings, will properly prepare us for our future: our immediate future and our eternal future full of celebration and overflowing joy. So thank God for His promises today and 'laugh at the days to come.'"

... And How Do You Feel About That?

Today we found a mood ring hidden in the deep dark crevices of the youngest's school desk. A simple semi-round mood ring with little golden Ichthus symbols etched into the thermochromic liquid crystal... so simple and yet so fun! :-)
So we take turns trying it on...
-For the youngest it turns a yellowish green and the space within the Ichthus symbols turns deep dark purple. We Googled it and found that the yellow means excitement (imaginative, wandering thoughts). The green is relaxation (average, not under great stress). The dark purple however means clarity and confidence in one's purpose... I'm not sure if I should look confused or if it's okay to laugh... :-) So far, this mood ring seemed pretty right on...
-So Mom tries it on. It turns a greenish yellow and the Ichthus turns blue. So-relaxation and wandering thoughts... that fits her today. The blue means relaxation (again) as well as at ease and calm which fits her today as well!
-My turn. It turns a deep dark blue with just the tiniest hint of purple and the Ichthus symbols turned several different colors kind of swirled together; purple, pink, yellow, and a bit of green. The dark blue is happiness, passion, and romance...?!? okay... my average body temperature is slightly lower than the average homo sapien... but so is Mom's... Hm. Well, the purple also means clarity... which I suppose is something I've been getting a little bit of over the last few days... much needed clarity. Pink is fear, uncertainty, and unanswered questions... wait- what happened to the clarity?! Actually pink is somewhat on and I could interpret it as being right, as well as maybe just a little bit of the purple. The tiny bits of yellow and green mean imagination and lack of stress...
Hm... I think I'm going to stick with just knowing myself and what I feel. The second and third times I put the ring on, it gave me completely different colors!
We had a good laugh about it and it was fun to compare said feelings with what we each thought was going on in our own lives. As I sat down to write this post, the youngest looks up from his homework and says, "What does yellow, orangey, brown mean?" Well, that's bronze- "Steven," I say, "You're homework has the jitters!"

Life is Like a Bowling Alley.

There are so many lanes to choose from and nobody really can say that one or another is best. But, you won't have any fun unless you pick one and just start a game... and when it comes down to it... you don't really have a choice anyway; lanes are usually assigned and besides, who really cares which lane they get- it's the people you go with that really matter. Sure, you can have a great game if you're really focused but the less you think the more you laugh and doesn't a smile trump everything else?

Sticker-Me Birthday!

There's a tooth on the desk.
Eew.
My little brother just lost one. I think I found it. That's disgusting, boy.

Though it has been only one month since the last time I blogged it is a whole new year and I'm a whole year older! Thank you to all of my friends who wished me a very happy birthday- it was indeed very happy- I love you all too.
I'd also like to take a moment to thank all of the beautiful little boys and girls who so happily decorated me with stickers on my birthday. As much as I enjoyed it- I do believe that you all enjoyed it more!
Last night I was finally welcomed into the twenty-first century. Why now? because I have finally gotten myself a cell phone. "Jax" is on his happy little way to me in the mail this very moment.
What? Don't you name your electronics too?
My Ipod is "Kevin".
My computer is momentarily nameless... I'm working on that.
My exercise ball is "Bob". I know, that's a little weird... but wait! it get's weirder:
My Ficus Plant is "Mike".
I like Mike. :-)

Samia